My fat 36 week belly

I've had a few requests to post my pregnant belly so here you go. I just want to point out that I have been feeling like crap for the last week. My allergies are kicking up.

A funny thing happened last night. I got into bed with Jacob and was sound asleep. All of a sudden I wake up because I'm falling out of bed. I tried to compensate and stay on the bed but ended up falling off and landing on my feet (thankfully). Jacob was in a really good sleep and didn't realize he was taking up THE WHOLE BED. He slept right through the whole thing. I told him about it this morning and he didn't believe me. I'm glad someone got some good sleep last night!

I've gained 19 pounds so far. With Emma I gained 12 total so 19 pounds is looking like a lot to me. I know that most women gain in upwards of 20-40 pounds but apparently my body reacts differently to pregnancy. My grandmother (dad's mom) only gained 15 pounds with all 3 of her kids. My mom on the other hand gained 50 with me, 60 with Tyler and 40 with Kaleb... poor lady!

It's really different this last month this time around. With Emma I exercised the whole way through my pregnancy and this time I haven't done hardly any. My hips never hurt with Emma. In fact, I'm convinced that they never softened and seperated (a likely reason why she got stuck and wouldn't fit through the birth canal). This time my hips hurt like crazy! Emma has been wanting to go on walks lately which I've decided is a good thing for me even though I'm in tears by the end.

I felt so pretty when I was pregnant with Emma at 9 months and this time I totally don't. I just feel fat. (Maybe it's because I've gained more weight with this one?).

I'm already retaining water which I didn't do until I was overdue with Emma. It sucks! I've cut back on the salty foods and increased my water intake but it hasn't worked.

I'm nervous about labor. I went through 20 hours of labor with Emma and ended up having a C-Section. I'm attempting labor again if Linnea is positioned correctly but I'm so scared that I could end up having another C Section. Surgery is just a freaky thing for me. I have a major phobia of it.

I REALLY want this baby out! I found out I was pregnant before I skipped my first period and consequently feel like I've been pregnant for forever! I wish I were one of those women who finds out after two skipped periods! I knew before I took the test that I was pregnant. It was kinda weird... I really knew.

I've sucked at taking my multi vitamins this pregnancy. The last 2 months I've taken them probably 4 times. That makes me nervous about the development of my baby. I'm not a healthy eater this time around. With Emma I ate no sweets, and no meat. This time I crave meat and sweets unhealthily.

Anyway, as you can see I'm also an emotional/mental mess which I wasn't with Emma. I've got all these fears and just want the baby to come right now so they will disappear. For those of you who've made it this far... I'm sorry for all my ranting.